Dead to Me is a dark comedy-drama, available on Netflix since May 2019. The ten-episode series is created by Liz Feldman, alongside many producers, with cinematography by Danny Moder. The programme features a great cast, starring Christina Applegate and Linda Cardellini.
We follow the friendship between two women, Judy Hale (Linda Cardellini) and Jen Harding (Christina Applegate), who meet at a grief support group.
Initial Thoughts
Whilst going into the programme, I didn’t have great expectations; I believed I wouldn't find it very interesting. I thought I would not be their target audience, but wanted to try something a little different.
Most of my comments are in regard to the narrative, rather than the film production – as I believe the narrative is the focus of the show. However, I did initially acknowledge the nice shots, that were consistent throughout the programme.
Surprisingly, I found the comedy immediately funny – the dark comedic discussion of death made me realise this might actually be enjoyable for me. Keep in mind, I don’t research these shows before watching. I simply watch them, not knowing the genre or style. I only saw some of the trailer. There was a mixture of sadness and comedy, and I couldn’t work out what emotion would be dominant within the series. As soon as Judy was introduced, I loved her character and costume. Their friendship quickly blossomed, and I adored it. The combination of this ‘huggy’, girly character to this stand offish, independent character was a great relationship to see. It was relatable for both types of people and was also comical.
The narrative quickly progressed, I was shocked and amazed. Even in the first episode so much was revealed, so many questions were there to be asked and I was amazed that I was so intrigued and gripped by the story.
Positive Critiques
A good programme will often make you question the characters intentions. Throughout the whole programme I was questioning myself and how I should feel towards Judy. I loved her character so much but sometimes questions whether she was actually insane - I sometimes heavily disagreed with her decisions towards her fiancé Steve (James Marsden).
They shared information about a lot of important situations. They discuss miscarriages heavily and what effects that can have on a person’s life. They show that having a miscarriage is a large loss for people. I loved how it discussed the way women can feel when incapable of having children, and the great loss and sadness that can come alongside it. It is important that people are aware of this. They also show how people grieve. After Jen loses her husband, she hides her emotional state from her children in order to help them. There is a scene of her screaming and crying into a pillow which was one of the most effective scenes within the programme. The incorporation of comedy within the grieving process was also funny, as Judy enjoyed meditation and spiritualism were as Jen’s ‘meditation’ was listening to graphic heavy metal music loud in her car. It showed this contrast of people and how they deal with their emotions.
I thought the narrative would consist of their growing friendship and accepting their grief and learning how to move on. I was stunned with the DRAMA. I never expected the show to take the dramatic turn that it did. There were so many devastating and jaw-dropping moments, it was honestly thrilling to watch everything unfold.
They continued to inform people of the stages of losing a loved one, not wanting to move their belongings or enter their bedroom. I loved how Jen’s son, Henry (Luke Roessler) believed his dad had reincarnated into a bird that would wake him every morning. It showed how his mum thought it was dumb and weird but how Judy thought it was possible and a good way of dealing with his dad’s death.
We are introduced into the character of Abe (Edward Asner) who was honestly a great (possibly my favourite) character, as he constantly said what I was thinking. We met the mother in law, Lorna (Valerie Mahaffey) who was a great annoyance who held an interesting storyline. Along with Steve, who was one of the most annoying characters- creating intense plots. However, I feel that the most intense and distressing plot was ‘Bambi88’. This is such a horrific storyline because it’s something I never considered could happen after people lose their loved ones. I cannot imagine how much more intense the situation of adultery would be if the person had died and cannot be confronted. Horrific.
Honestly, I wasn’t expecting the programme to be too funny. Mainly due to my experience of female comedians, the heavy female cast wasn’t leading me to expect laughs. I found some of the one-liners so funny, especially from Jen. There were some risky jokes towards religion that were some of the funniest, with Jen’s pessimism to life. The funniest character to me was the psychotic kid who found the body- Shandy Adams (Adora Soleil Bricher). Every line that came out of her mouth was hilarious, leading me to constantly laugh out loud. I loved how they built it up to expect this horrifically traumatised child but on the contrary, she wasn’t fazed and loved the experience.
One of my notes whilst watching was ‘I never knew I would feel so AWFUL over this show’. I wasn’t expecting to adore the characters or feel their pain and guilt. The show is so informative of terrible situations and circumstances yet so comical and lovable. There are some utterly heart-breaking scenes, my jaw dropped, my heart dropped, I CRIED. I also hated characters, loved characters, laughed and despite expectation- thoroughly enjoyed every moment.
Negative Critiques
I have very few negative comments. There were a few techniques that weren’t too effective for me. They sometimes used a heartbeat sound effect to build tension, though I didn’t find it to increase the tension at all. There was one scene were some wacky canted camera angles were used, that would usually signify madness/craziness, but it felt unusual to the scene. These were very small additions that barely effected the programme as a whole.
Also, I found the ending a tad abrupt, I wasn’t sure how to take it. I felt like it pretty much resolved everything but made me a little more uncomfortable than a rounded off ending would. Though I guess they opened it up for questions, rather than creating a ‘happily ever after’ ending that they obviously weren’t aiming for.
Final Thoughts
This programme has actually changed my perspective. I would never expect this type of programme to intrigue or hook me. However, it did. Even with my favourite programmes I would have multiple negative critiques, but this series was so enjoyable, lovable and interesting. I can imagine SO MANY middle-aged women LOVING this programme and relating to their characteristics. Though, considering I’m a 20-year-old girl – it’s open for a large audience to enjoy. This programme has forced me to remain open minded and not ‘judge a book by it’s cover’. Brilliant.
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